The First Goodbye

This marks the end of my time as a stay at home mom, as I head back to work and we all start a new routine this week.

We just dropped him off at the baby-sitter half hour ago and it will be the longest ever that I’d be away from him – for the entire duration of a working day. I’d known and dreaded this day since months ago, the “Day 61” (because the statutory paid maternity leave in this country is 2 months / 60 days and you return to work on Day 61 or thereabouts; but I took an additional month off so today is Day I-Cannot-Count).

We’d prepared for this day for weeks, buying the necessary things to put in the babysitter’s place, planning out logistics and most importantly, pumping / calculating to ensure he has enough milk for the whole day.

I’m a bit sad but not as maudlin as I thought I’d be (though it’s barely been an hour, will check back a few hours later). I know in principle that it’s good for all of us since I do have to return to work, and it’ll actually give my painful hands and wrists a chance to heal a bit since I won’t be carrying him the whole day. Plus the time away from baby is necessary to attend to other things – work, household, etc.


But for now, excuse me while I go cry into my chai, missing my baby 😭😭😭

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The First Week Back At Work

I made it through the first week back at work and it was excruciating. Physically, I was unaccustomed to the new routine, getting up early and driving through heavy traffic during rush hour. Though I’d done that for many years before this, doing it now with broken, shallow sleep takes some getting used to. Also there are so many things to pack and bring before we leave the house that by the time I hit the traffic, I am already tired. More than anything though, I missed my baby terribly. Some mornings I was crying after dropping him off and had to put on my sunnies so the other drivers on the road wouldn’t think I’m mad. He is happy, alert, gurgly and smiley in the mornings and I just hated that I had to leave him. I missed feeding him while I’m at work, looking at his cute little face as he latched on and suckling away. I now cherish every nursing session even more as they are just such precious time with him.   I will imagine his drinking facial expressions and the c...
Read more

A Review : Haakaa Silicone Breast Pump

Image
Something funny happened this morning. The Man is usually in charge of all midnight and early morning diaper changes. I’d wake him up to do it since he sleeps through most of the through-the-night-feeds. I actually think he has the shorter end of the deal because I only have to bring baby to the breasts, and baby and I then drift back to sleep, but he’d have to wake up properly to change nappies. Anyway, he brought the baby back to me, all fresh and clean this morning, and I continued nursing baby while patting his bum to help him sleep. It was all smooth and soft and at first I thought.. ahhhhhhh ..the feel of clean diapers (I was half asleep and groggy). But upon further patting…I realized I was patting on baby’s bare bottom! It jolted me awake and gave me mild panic because the baby had just farted (fart, shart..we never really know). But all was well and we had a laugh over it. I want to write about the Haakaa Silicone Breast Pump. The second picture is take...
Read more

Finding the Sweet Spot

Ahhh..the sweet spot. That heavenly feeling when you scratch that proverbial itch; when your hot drink is at the right sipping temperature; when a scent is sweet without cloying..you get the idea. The sweet spot I’m talking about here, and with which I struggle to achieve is that of being a good mom AND a happy person at the same time. The two should never be mutually exclusive. But there are so many physical, mental and emotional tolls that come with being a mother (I’m just beginning to get the taste of) – managing the household, ensuring the well-being and healthy development of your kid(s) in all aspects, taking care of yourself and other members of the family (such as the furry 4-legged ones), and, if you’re a working mama, holding down that job. All these different demands very easily corrode a woman’s personhood until all that fills the head is accomplishing tasks instead of simply living and enjoying your baby, your family and all the things that life has to offer. P...
Read more